Steele Drivin' Man 13/?

Date: December 6, 1984
Mileage: 38,292
Maintenance: Replace rear shocks

This week started out pretty good for Mr. Steele, but by the time it was all over his body and his ego had both gotten kinda beat up.

I mean, what is it with famous people? Do they get some kind of thrill out of putting down ordinary guys like us? I hope we never have to deal with people like that again, especially if they're going to act like that old coot. That Nolan thinks he's some tough guy, but Bruce Lee he ain't.

But anyway. Saturday night was pretty exciting I'll have to admit. For days Mr. Steele had been going on and on about the Hollywood Archives ceremony, and about actually meeting some movie stars. I listened to his little presentation speech a dozen times as he tried to get it just right. Miss Holt didn't say anything but I could tell she was pretty pleased with herself for getting the invite.

By the time Saturday night came around, he could barely hold himself down. You know, when he gets excited he starts talking faster and faster. Well, he was going a mile a minute by the time I picked them up. Miss Holt tried to calm him down but she was pretty wound up, too. Even her dress didn't distract him much.

The best part for me was getting in line with all the other limos to drop off passengers. I could see the TV lights and camera flashes as we got closer. I pulled up to the curb like we were arriving at the Oscars. Some camera people ran up when I stopped, but when they saw it was just Miss Holt and Mr. Steele, they walked away. Well, excuse me!

I cooled my heels in the parking lot during the ceremony, but afterwards I began wishing I had been keeping closer tabs on Mr. Steele. If I had known he was going to end up in a dumpster I would have stayed close by. He was OK, but we picked up some old movie star along the way, Miss Mayo somebody. Never heard of her. Obviously Mr. Steele had because he was all excited again being in the same car with her. She wasn't much for conversation. Stuck up movie star. Later on, though, after I thought about it, she did seem a little nervous.

When we got to her house, Miss Holt asked me to keep an eye on things outside while they went in with Miss Mayo. I played lookout and took a walk up and down the driveway every once in a while. After half an hour, Mr. Steele came out and told me Miss Holt was staying for a bit, so I took him home, came back for Miss Holt and took her home.

The next day I waited around for someone to need me. Mr. Steele drove himself to that old coot's house, but it wasn't too far into the morning when he called and asked me to come to Nolan's place, and to bring towels. Well, that had me wondering. When I got there he looked like he'd fallen in a ditch. He apologized for making me drive out there, but he didn't want to get the seats wet in the Auburn. Uh-huh. So I took him home to clean up.

After he dried out I dropped him off at some other movie star's house. I kinda wished he had asked me to stick around, because that story he told me about the mailman at Nolan's house gave me chills. And on top of that, I find out later he and Miss Holt were shot at again!

If they would just let me drive I could maybe keep these things from happening. Or at least be a lookout while they're busy.

That evening I took Miss Holt to Rossmore and she told me to go home, but I thought with everything that had been going on, it would be best for me to stick around. It's a good thing I did, because I saw Nolan and some linebacker type go in, and not five minutes later they were in the car and we were off to Miss Mayo's again.

Before I could open my mouth to point out that this wasn't going to work, I had six passengers packed into the limo. Mr. Widebody took up half of the backseat, and I didn't have much room to maneuver with two in the front. We were putting some serious stress on the suspension. I could just see us bottoming out in a driveway.

I got us going as fast as I could considering the load and headed for the address Miss Holt gave me. It occurred to me that Mr. Steele was being awfully quiet seeing as he was in the same small space with three movie stars. I realized that he had had less and less to say as time passed, and at first I thought it was from being shot at more then once. Then Nolan made some crack about Mr. Steele not having a gun, and I saw his face fall a little more. The lightbulb finally came on this was obviously just the latest in a bunch of putdowns Mr. Steele had been dealing with.

We got to the house we were looking for and everyone went in, although it did seem to take Mr. Steele longer than usual to deal with the lock. I watched lights go on around the house. Considering everything that had happened I was being extra watchful. That's when I noticed someone cutting through the hedges to the back door. I got out as quietly as I could and followed him up the driveway. Obviously he had a key because I couldn't catch up with him before he was inside. Suddenly the lights went out and I heard a terrible scuffle going on inside. I opened the door to go in and got knocked over by this same guy, I think. I jumped to my feet and might have caught him, too, if it hadn't been for the stampede of people who came next. We all ran for the limo, except for the old gals. Nolan and Widebody and me got to the car first, and Mr. Steele and Miss Holt were hurrying the other two. They shuffled along as fast as their little old movie star feet could go, but I think if Mr. Steele could have had his way he would have picked them up and carried them.

We piled in again and I took off after the bad guy as fast as the beast would go, but a cludge like the limo packed with people is no match for one guy in a fast car. When Nolan said, "C'mon, driver, burn some rubber," he's lucky we had a lady between us, or I would have reached over and throttled him. I got a name, ya know!

The other car got quite a lead on me, but it was late and there wasn't a lot of traffic, so I didn't have much trouble tailing him to a warehouse. Mr. Steele just shoved Widebody out of the way and ran inside. Miss Holt jumped over Miss Mayo, literally, and was right behind him. Nolan wanted her to call the police, but she just looked at him and ran inside. I knew it was time for some help, so I got on the car phone and called the cops. Then I called Miss Krebs.

The old folks milled around on the sidewalk while I went inside and tried to find Mr. Steele and Miss Holt. Fortunately the ambulance got there real quick, and by the time they got in I had found them. They must have been hurting bad because neither one of them tried to move.

The EMTs shooed me outside and I went back to the limo. I got there just in time to listen to Nolan second guessing Mr. Steele, going on and on about how he should have waited for "the experts". Well, that did it. I wasn't going to listen to anymore. Maybe I was tired, mostly I was disgusted. I told all three of them that just because they were movie stars they didn't have a right to talk down to Mr. Steele the way they had been.

They stood there all kinda slack-jawed while I lit into them. I told them that Mr. Steele and Miss Holt had just put their lives on the line for them, and the least they could do would be to at least act grateful. They'd been acting all their lives they could act like that, too.

They all looked pretty sheepish when Miss Holt and Mr. Steele came out on stretchers. After they were loaded in the ambulance, I told the three of them that I'd be around for them by 10 in the morning, to take them to the hospital so that they could express their appreciation.

Huh. Movie stars. If that's lifestyles of the rich and famous, count me out!

To Be Continued---

To Part 14


BACK FileCabinet