- Steele Not The Real Thing
Date: Thursday, February 15, 2001
- Breezy <email@example.com>
This is just a little story for all of those Valentine's cynics
and a way of venting the days events... to a certain extent.
Please do archive and I welcome any and all feedback. The idiot
Steele Not The Real Thing
Laura Holt sat staring at the toaster oven in her dorm room waiting
for her pizza to finish cooking. The night had not turned out
to be exactly what she expected; actually it hadn't turned out
to be anything she had expected. Right now she was pretty down
It was Friday night before a long weekend and she had nothing
to do. She had made plans earlier in the week and had turned
down four other people since, but that afternoon she had a huge
fight with the guy she had made the plans with.
Ryan Perkins, he was in all of her classes this semester. Last
semester he had been in her Western Civ class and they had been
in a study group together. They had started talking and she found
out they were both in the math program, that's why they were
in all of the same classes.
Not only were they both in the same major, but they listened
to the same music, had some of the same hobbies, he made her
laugh constantly, constantly told her how wonderful she was,
made her feel special, and to top it all off was drop dead gorgeous.
She had fallen hard for him. She had told all of her friends,
even her sister Frances that she was going to marry him. He was
perfect. There was not one flaw she could find. Sure, he was
three years older than her and he had partied a little harder
than she would have in his high school days, he had even dropped
out, but now he had changed. The whole world amazed him and it
warmed Laura's heart to know that she amazed him more than anything
Since the second week of classes they had spent every moment
during the day together, talking about everything, going to guest
lectures, and having fun. He had never mentioned that he already
had a girlfriend. This wasn't the part that had upset Laura though.
- She knew she was special to him.
He let her know that everyday with the way he'd wink at her when
he used a joke only they shared or when they were studying he
would quietly move his hand so it rested against hers. He also
bought her lunch on more occasions than she could count. That's
why she couldn't understand how he could do what he had.
She had started the day off in an unusually chipper mood at the
crack of dawn. When she got to the front of the building where
her first class was she saw Ryan talking to one of the girls
in their class. As Laura walked up and said hi, she noticed that
they changed the subject. She also noticed that Ryan looked a
bit uncomfortable. She looked at him a second time, trying to
appraise where his discomfort originated.
That's when she noticed he was wearing a huge sweater. She thought
about it for a minute, but froze in place when he moved to push
his hair back. Right in the middle of his neck, there was no
denying what that giant purple mouth shaped bruise was. She wasn't
sure of what she should do next.
"Ryan Perkins! Is that what I think it is --," The
other girl started to ask.
"Bahhh, Danni," he paused and mouthed to the other
girl that he didn't want Laura to know about the mark below his
ear, "Yeah, I like large collars, speaking of which, why
don't you ever wear that boa that you told us you bought in ...Frisco?"
Laura smirked, what did this guy think she was? A moron? A blind
moron? She felt like pounding the life out of him, but decided
against mutilation instead opting for quiet seething. She ignored
the rest of the conversation and walked into the room.
The class was small which had afforded her the luxury of getting
to know the professor. This also allowed the professor to get
to know her. They were actually very funny together telling all
sorts of tame jokes that had been told since the beginning of
- Unfortunately Dr. Biggs noticed
immediately that Laura was not her usual enthusiastic self. He
had been watching her and Ryan since the start of the class knowing
that Laura was very interested in the boy. He had also noticed
that Ryan had developed more than an academic relationship with
her. Thinking that they were more than just study buddies he
started off class with a question.
- "So, how is everyone spending
their long weekend?" He looked around at the predominantly
female class, "Ryan, are you planning on spending the weekend
with your lucky lady?" Biggs glanced over at Laura and winked.
- "Uhhh, no, sir, I, ummm, I'm
just going to spend the weekend with myself. She won't be- er,
just alone," Ryan stared down at his notebook and pulled
the over sized collar of his sweater up a little further.
- The professor looked quizzically
over at Laura then started to teach class. When the class got
out Laura leapt out of her seat and grabbed her books. She rushed
over to the cafeteria to get a chocolate milk for lunch and sit
in a corner.
- When she found a spot she pulled
out her notebook and began to burry herself in her notes. She
reached for her carton without looking and encountered a large
hand covering the box.
- "Hey Laura, where are you?"
Ryan grabbed her hand and willed her to look at him.
- She looked up and spoke just loud
enough for him to hear her, "Nowhere. I am just trying to
study for the quiz."
"Great, you want me to quiz you?" He shot her a smile
that would have melted her if she had been looking at him.
"No, I think I have it under control," and she did
if he would just leave and never talk to her again. Did he really
think I was that stupid? Maybe if I mention it he'll tell me
he punched his neck.
"Fine, would you mind quizzing me? I don't think I have
it down," he passed his notebook over to her hopefully.
- "I guess so," she opened
the book and started looking for the page where he had all of
his vocabulary listed and sighed, "Ready?"
- "No. What's wrong, Laura? You're
positively sedated. I haven't ever seen you this quiet. I'm a
little worried to tell you the truth," he had put his hand
on her wrist and tried to make eye contact with her.
- Laura twisted her wrist loose and
stared at the papers in front of her, "Nothing is wrong
with me. I am perfectly fine," it's you who has the problem
- The hour went by with that same
anger and awkwardness until their next class. The test was pretty
easy. Laura finished it in a tie for first with the girl from
the morning and Ryan. As all three were leaving the room, Dr.
Biggs grabbed her and talked to her.
- "Laura, are you sure you're
ok? You look like you were hit by an eighteen wheeler."
Laura mustered all of her strength not to loose her composure.
She wasn't sure if she would scream or cry if she tried to admit
how she felt, "I'm fine, really. I just need to take a nap."
"Well, as long as you're fine I recommend giving Ryan a
piece of your mind the next time the two of you are alone, that's
one doosey of a hickey that boy has and I can tell you didn't
put it there. If you want you can borrow my office."
Laura grinned, "Thanks, I'll tell you about it when I get
back on Monday."
- As she walked outside she saw Ryan
leaning on the wall and decided to talk to him now before they
left for their night of pizza and movies.
"Hey, Ryan, tell me, do you think you're starting a trend
wearing that enormous sweater in sixty degree weather?"
Laura tugged at his collar and he tried to cover the mark with
his hand, "Or is it that gargantuan love bite that makes
you wear it?"
"Uh, Laura, I thought you hadn't noticed. I, um, I should
tell you I have a girlfriend. We aren't serious or anything,
but she got a bit over excited and--," he was fishing for
something to say.
"That is none of my business, whatever you do outside of
class is none of my business and from now on nothing I do outside
of class is your business," she turned to walk away when
Ryan grabbed her shoulder.
- "Laura, I care about you. You
are the best friend I have here. You have helped in so many ways
you can't understand. If we work out I'll dump her like--."
"If? If we work out you're going to dump her. How kind of
you," she was ready to rip out his throat and stomp on it,
but her voice remained deathly even, "Don't worry yourself
with that. We won't be working out ever. You can go home to your
vampire and not have to worry about me ever again. Have a great
God damned weekend. I won't!" Laura finished her tirade
at a much higher decibel level than when she first began and
That left her here; all alone in her dorm room waiting for her
frozen pizza to cook. She sat and wondered if she had just let
the man of her dreams slip through her fingers. Her eyes burned,
but she fought the tears. She wasn't going to let any guy get
to her like that. She was tough as nails Laura Holt. She pulled
the pizza out of the toaster oven and devoured it as if it would
fix everything. All it did was make her stomach feel a little
- She spent the rest of the night
getting lost in Rebecca, a book she had read a few times and
had fallen in love with. If only she could find a mystery man
like Maxim DeWinter. She laughed sadly knowing for sure she wouldn't
ever be so lucky to find someone who was worth keeping such a
large secret for. That night as Laura fell asleep she promised
she wouldn't let herself get strung along again like that and
as she drifted off a single tear fell down her cheek.
- The End