- Steele Untitled 1/?
Date: Tuesday, January 29, 2002 8:19
- Sinead O'Byrne <SteeleaScarecrow@hotmail.com>
Here it is! 400 revisions, and countless fights with my computer
finally produced this not-quite-masterpeice! As usual-I'd love
to hear from
you! Tell me about it! Enjoy! Oh-and if anyone can come up with
a title, I'd be most appreciative!
Steele Untitled 1/?
Permission To Archive
Rating-currently G-PG but later on..........
I walked down the street, pausing only slightly as I looked up
at the large
twin buildings in front of me. I gulped, and walked up to the
door. I gave
the stout little man at the front desk a curt nod before walking
into one of
the dual elevators and hitting the button for the 11th floor.
It was quite
easy to spot the office I wanted, it was one of the largest.
up, and walked through the doors, to be greeted by the stout,
receptionist. I gulped, serving the dual purpose of lubricating
and to swallow some of my nervousness. I didn't even know why
I was so
nervous, after all, he WAS expecting me.
"Is Mr. Steele in?" I asked, as nonchalantly as possible.
"No, but his associate, Miss Holt is." The woman said.
She had æFed' written
all over her. I'd learned to spot it a long time ago. So long
it seemed like
another lifetime. A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away.
hiding my laughter with a poker face that had won me more than
"I'd very much prefer to see Mr. Steele in person. I can
wait until he comes
in." The blond just shrugged and gestured towards the couch,
going through the mail. I picked up a magazine from the small
stack on the
counter next to the couches, and starting flipping through it,
it was a good few weeks behind. Suddenly, a man burst through
doors. You could almost feel his exuberant personality.
"Hello Mildred darling, is Miss Holt in?" He asked,
his accent ringing true.
"Yes, but she's got a client meeting in five, and you have
a client who
wants to speak to you alone right here." He turned in my
direction. When he
saw me, he seemed almost at a loss for words. "My office,
if you please." He
said, walking ahead of me to the right hand office. When he had
door, positive that our conversation probably wouldn't be heard,
into a grin, and hugged me. "Tabby! It's been ages! What
are you doing
here?" I laughed as he rambled through his introduction.
"It HAS been a while, hasn't it, Harry? Well, I'm here in
the states on
vacation, and figured since I've heard so much about you being
here in LA
from Daniel, and from you, that I decided that a week here wouldn't
Besides, I heard that there's a very lucrative chance that you
can meet some
of Hollywood's biggest here!"
"Duh! What'd you think, I was here trying to charm someone
outta their life
savings? Nah, Harry, I'm past that! I'm here to see the sights
"So what do you do now?"
"Freelancing, mostly. Odd jobs here and there to help with
the bills. But I
change hotels so often that they don't have anywhere to bill
"Once a crook, always a crook, eh?"
"Hey, look who's talking, mate, you've gone from art thief
LA's top PI! If that's not pulling the world's biggest con, I
what is! But strangely, you're pulling a con while being on the
narrow. Ironic, huh?"
"You always did spot the ironies, Tabitha."
"Yeah, well coming up with funny coincidences has helped
me get some
articles published here and there. Wouldn't mind doing ANOTHER
"Knowing you, you'd stick yourself in every other line,
and mention my
"Harry, come on mate! I have a large ego, yes, but I ain't
no traitor!" I
said, starting to get a little testy.
"OK, OK. So why are you here, instead of out meeting Bryon
"Well, I decided to be a decent person, unlike you, and
stop by to meet my
nearest and dearest friend."
"I DID try and stop by your flat the last time I was in
London, but you
"That would be the Earl Of Claridge incident. Care to comment?"
pulling out a tape recorder from my purse. The look of shock
on his face was
more than enough to make me burst out laughing. "Care to
go to lunch? Talk
about old times?" I asked him,
putting the small tool back in my bag.
"I only just arrived."
"Well, if you decided to learn that there ARE hours of the
day before lunch,
wouldn't be just arriving, now would you?"
"Old habits die hard, what can I say?"
"How about æI know a good pizza place around here,
"I don't know any good pizza places, per say, but I DO know
a good Italian
restaurant that serves pizza."
"Good, where is it, I have a sudden urge for pizza."
"You never really were one for quality, were you?"
"You mean, I never was one to pay 400 bucks for a meal,
"Yeah, well now you got this place to foot the bill. Always
did enjoy having
someone else pay, huh?"
"I do pay for my own."
"I will right now." I loved to egg him on. I'd always
been able to get my
way with him when I provoked him enough. I wanted money, all
I had to do was
tell him that he'd never give me a cent, then tell him prove
it when he
said that he had. It worked every single time. He walked out,
and it was all
I could do to keep up. "If Miss Holt comes back, I'm going
out to lunch." He
told the secretary. Once we were again out of earshot, I looked
up at him.
"The unflappable, irreplaceable, lovable, Mildred Krebs?"
I asked him.
"Yes, that was Mildred."
"Defiantly was a former IRS. Could sense it."
"Tab, you could sense a car starting in Timbuktu!"
"Nah, I wouldn't sense a car starting. I'd sense the guy
getting in, and
turning the key!" I said, a good-natured grin plastered
to my face. When the
elevator came up, a woman who looked rather pissed walked out.
She was about
to plow right through us, when she stopped.
""Laura! I thought you were supposed to be meeting
"I was supposed to be, until he decided not to show up!
What were you
"I was just about to go to lunch with Miss-uh-Tabitha.."He
gave me a
"Blaine. Tabitha Blaine" I supplied. He gave me look,
and I shrugged. "You
must be the infamous Laura Holt. Care to join us?" I asked,
wanting to say
on her good side, if she had the temper that Harry said she had.
about it for a minute, looking me over, before sighing, and turning
to get back into the elevator. Lunch went smoothly, chatting
absolutely nothing in particular. All safe and harmless topics,
weather. Right before we were about to leave, I got up to go
bathroom, and she decided to join me.
"All right, you know him from someplace else." She
said, as I got out my
"If you must know, yes, I've known Harry longer than he'd
care to tell
anyone." She was good. I could see why she'd decided to
be a PI, and not
give up on it, either.
"How long is that?"
"Since he was about oh, I'd say about 12." That was
about right. I didn't
even know how
old he was know, let alone twenty some odd years ago.
"And why are you here?"
"My, my, my, aren't we inquisitive. Well, if you must know,
I came here to
see the city, and decided to pay a visit on an old friend. I'm
sure you'd do
the same, if you were in, oh say, Denver." I'd done it,
I'd struck a nerve,
I was sure of it. At least she was good at maintaining her composure.
thanked god for Harry being in the restaurant attached, and that
constantly wrote and called. It was the only way I'd known about
He'd stayed so far in the background that I could hardly find
"Yes, I suppose I would do the same thing. And It's part
of my job to be
"It's part of mine to be inquisitive as well. How do you
think I knew about
"And what is that you do, Miss Blaine, if that's your real
"It's the one I use, yes. And I freelance. I decided to
check out some stars
while I was at it. Now, Harry's probably wondering what's taking
long!" I said, returning to my usual devil-may-care self.
something wrong, and when we went back, he just told Laura that
he'd see me
"OK, what happened back at the resturant?"
"I don't think she trusts me, nor my intentions. I think
it had something to
do with bringing up you dear old friend Murphy." He winced.
"You mentioned Murphy?"
"Yes. Now, you know any good hotels? I'm pretty jetlagged."
"Look, stay at my place until tonight, then go and find
a hotel. Just
remember, make sure
you're out by tonight." He said, scrawling his address across
a piece of
paper. "Here's where you can find me, but I'll have Fred
"OK Harry, see ya around, mate!"
"See you around." He said, hugging me again, as I climbed
back into the
"Mr. Steele's apartment, Fred." I said, glancing up
only slightly, noticing,
however the slight smile that played across his lips in the rearview
"Find something amusing?" I asked him.
"Well, it's just that you sounded almost exactly like Miss
Holt does when
she says that."
"I do, do I? Tell me, is she always that wary of other people?"
"Well, it really isn't my place to say anythingàà."
"Come on, Fred, is she always that testy?"
"Around Mr. Steele, yes. I don't think she'd ever admit
it, but she has a
jealous streak a mile long when it comes to him. They're head
over heels for
each other, but they have yet to spot it."
"Thanks, Fred, I'm sure Har-Mr. Steele's honored to have
someone like you as
personal chauffeur." I said, getting out. I had managed
to catch my slip
"Well, if you ever need a ride while you're in LA, give
me a call, and I'll
see what I can do. Any friend of Mr. Steele's is a friend of
grinned, and walked into the elevator.
"I'm god's gift to the reporting world!" I praised
myself as I walked to 5A.
I pulled out my lock-pick kit as I remembered that Harry hadn't
left me a
key. "I AM INVINCEABLE!" I laughed as I shouted the
phrase after closing
the door. "Nothing I can't do, can't weasel out of!"
Walking over to his
kitchen, I threw open the fridge. "Let's see if the gourmet
leftovers!" I looked over all the shelves, pulling up the
of tin foil that covered a bowl here, a pot there. "Oooooo!
Canard au vin
rouge!" I said, pulling out the tray. Spotting a microwave,
transferred the remaining half of the duck to a plate, and stuck
I spent the time waiting for it to reheat checking out his apartment.
really was quite nice. Nothing to sneeze at. Checking the bedroom,
wondered if Harry and Laura had ever spent the night together
there, until I
remembered him complaining about how she wanted a commitment,
and was rather
reluctant to get laid with him. "OK Tabitha O'Sullivan Chalmers
let's see if you've still got the touch!" I said, removing
my watch, I
quickly set it to time, and hit it to start, while proceeding
to open the
first drawer of the dresser. I felt through it, my eyes scanning
Nothing. I repeated the process with the second drawer, again
empty handed. But, upon trying my luck a third time, I found
leather of a passport, and pulled it out. I tried again, and
found the other
four I knew he had. I moved onto the nightstand. I found nothing
old files that he'd probably taken home to look at, and forgot
other nightstand was where things got interesting.
I immediately felt the smooth crushed velvet of something that
I wished I
knew better. A ring box. I popped it open. Inside was a diamond
small baguettes of a purple jewel. Upon closer inspection, I
exactly what it was. Royal Lavulite. I laughed, realizing that
the jewel had
been what brought Harry and Laura together. He'd gone to steal
it, and came
back, or stayed rather, as Remington Steele, Los Angeles' finest
I sighed, and realized that the clock was still ticking, and
moved onto the
bathroom. Inside was absolutely nothing of value, and walked
checking the watch. 5 minutes, not bad, not bad at all.
Of course, I had also completely skipped the closet, knowing
that the only
thing that Harry ever kept in their was unvaluable odds and ends,
suits, suitcases, tennis rackets, sketchbooks- on second thought,
I went to
the hall closet. I quickly found the familiar yellow covered
book, I had one
just like it in my bag, which was in my rented Porsche, at his
parking lot. I flipped through it, nothing much, mostly landscapes,
were dated early 1982, once I got to October, they started to
take on a more
serious tone, before completely becoming drawings of Laura. A
he started doing the odd landscape thrown in with a few drawings
He was one of the best artists I knew, he could've been a damn
if he decided to, but the most I'd seen him do was a copy of
one of the
paintings in Daniel's study. The microwave beeped, to signal
that it was
done, and I had a feast on the duck.
There was a system to most things, dogs chase cats, mice eat
cheese, and I
got hungry every two hours. It was mostly to make up for the
fact that I
scrounged around between jobs, I took a free ride whenever it
It was harder to get a break as a writer than it looked, and
I never missed
an opportunity. I supposed that Laura could be a good interview,
decided to ask her about it. I put the sketchbook back, and crossed
his bookcase where I pulled out an interesting looking book.
I got hooked on
it over my snack, and before I knew it, I was sprawled out across
despite the lumpy mattress, and almost done with the book. I
finished it, and felt the effects of coming here from Asia, Japan
exact. I had been working my way east from England. I could feel
starting to close, and I jerked the covers up over my head. I
was out like a
light. The next thing I knew, I was being shaken awake by Harry.
"TABITHA O'SULLIVAN BLAINE! GET OUT OF THAT BED NOW!"
He shouted into me
"Thanks for destroying my eardrum, Harry."
"Well, I don't appreciate coming home to find plates strewn
across my table,
and you in my bed, especially not with Laura in tow."
"God, Harry, what time is it?" I asked stifling a yawn.
"About 9 PM."
"9! Holy shit! I'm sorry man, I seriously did not intend
to sleep that long.
I told you I shoulda gotten a hotel."
"They're hell to book in the middle of the day, besides,
Mildred found a
spot for you, she had nothing better to do. I hope you don't
digging on you, it's her idea of fun."
"Why shouldn't she? I have a folder about 6 inches thick
on her! And what
"What did you expect? O'Sullivan?"
"It IS my real surname."
"You haven't used that since I met you."
"You mean since I was forced in the same house as you. Daniel
had to drag
you kicking and screaming back into the house when you found
out that I was
"And as I remember you were ready to go back either to New
York or Ireland."
"Well, I AM Irish."
"But born and raised in New York, 4th generation immigrant."
"Born in NY, raised in England, from 10 to 25 I was with
you and Daniel."
"Sorry that I don't meet your requirements for detail."
I gave him a light
punch on the shoulder, and looked at the open bedroom door.
"You know, your Miss Holt's probably heard every word we've
"Knowing her, she's heard every word, and then some!"
"Well then, I must get to know her better, she'd be invaluable
reporter! Tell me, Harry, does she do interviews? She'd make
a great cover
story. How does the front page of TIME sound to you? I can see
Remington Steele Investigations, America's Top PI Firm, exclusive
interviews by Tabitha Blaine! I'd get the Pulitzer!"
"You're plagued with visions of adequacy!"
"HEY! That was MY line, against you! Now come on, your date's
outside!" I said walking through the door, finding Laura
across his couch. "I'm terribly sorry Miss Holt, but Harry
is so kind that
he offered me his flat until I could book a hotel, but I have
welcome, I'm leaving now." I said, playing all my charm.
"Wait one minute, Miss Blaine."
"Well then Tabitha, may I have a word with you in private?"
I looked over at
Harry. He shrugged, and walked out of the room, into the kitchen,
to prepare a gourmet dessert.
"Miss Holt, what is that word you had for me?"
"How do you really know him? Only people from his past call
"Like I said, I've known him since I was twelve."
"How'd you meet him?"
"Make it short."
"Geez, you're worse than he is when he decides to play a
shamus named Spade!"
"He's done the impression before?
"Hell yes! You know how annoying it was, to have a fifteen
year old running
around using that horrible accent!"
"He's gotten worse with age! The best was he was trying
to roll cigarettes
in the back of the limo." We both laughed at this.
"I feel sorry for Fred, and for you for having to put up
"Well, Tabitha, as I was saying how'd you meet him?"
"Put it this way, Daniel had his hands full with raising
"You were under his watch too?"
"Yup. He still does watch me like a hawk when he can. Same
with Harry, only
difference is, I always got the impression that he favored Harry
knew why Daniel favored Harry more as well, but I wasn't going
it now. "Harry's problem though, I hate it when Daniel breathes
neck, but he has a knack for finding things out, great resource
"A reporter you say, what do you report for, newspapers?"
"Just about everything!" Then I looked up, and realized
that Harry was still
waiting for the a-OK to come out. "YO! Harry man, what's
taking ya so long?
You're date's waiting, and I though you were a gentleman!"
I said, my grin
plastered to my face.
"CAT! Now get out!"
"Call me Cat again and I defiantly won't."
"Get out now Cat, or I'll kick you out!"
"Sheesh! All right already Harry, be that way. Ciao, See
ya mates!" I said,
giving them a grin and a wave before walking out.
- To Part