Thoughts of Steele 1/1
By: Janice Skyers < jskyers@netmail.hscbklyn.edu >
Date: Tuesday, March 07, 2000

Disclaimer: For all ages. Strictly for entertainment purposes.

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He entered the room, pulled out a chair, taking a seat. Thump, thump, thump, went his fingers on the wooden table. His eyes danced around the room. The only furniture in the room- a table and four chairs- no air conditioner. The atmosphere, cold and impersonal; the temperature was hot_so very hot. Thump, thump, thump_went his nervous fingers on the wooden table again. Today was going to be the worst day of HIS life.

She entered the room, pulled out a chair, taking a seat opposite him. She saw him loosen his silk tie. Thump, thump, thump, went her nervous fingers on the wooden table. It was hot_so very hot in this room. Today was going to be the worst day of HER life.

So it wasn't his imagination after all, it was hot_so very hot in this room. The sweat beads on her forehead verified that she too was so very hot.

So he must be very hot, since he just pulled the two top buttons on his shirt. Don't just sit there_say something_just anything_to stop me from signing on the dotted line.

Oh_so she's just going to sit there, and wait for me to make the first move_but isn't that the way it's always been through the course of our relationship. I lead while she follows. Sorry Darling, but I won't be the one to make the first move_at least not today.

I know what he's thinking_that he's the one who's always making the first move in this relationship- taking all the risks- but if that's what he's thinking, he's wrong, so VERY wrong. Has he forgotten that I'm the one who entered into a phony marriage, risking everything I have so that he wouldn't be deported out of the country.

So she saved my hide so I wouldn't be deported. But I was grateful-was I not- and wasn't I the one who suggested we get married "legally". But whether a phony or real marriage, I was a good husband. Was? I'm still her husband after all I haven't signed on the dotted line as yet.

I know that he was a good husband and I think- think? Hell I know that I was a good wife. Was? I'm still his wife after all I haven't signed on the dotted line as yet. Ungrateful that's what he is. Oh_instead of just sitting there and staring at me with those innocent blue eyes, why don't you say something- like_

What does she want me to say? Well since it appears that she's waiting on me to make the first move, here goes. "Ahem_.Er_" He said, pausing, the words getting caught in his throat.

"Yes?" She asked, looking hopeful, her brown eyes gleaming.

"Er_nothing," He saw her frown. So he is a man of few words but at least he made the effort. What about you Darling_anything you care to share with your husband?

As usual I'm the one who has to do all the giving in this relationship. It's obvious some things don't change with time. Anyway, here goes. "Ahem. Ah_" she said, pausing, the words getting caught in her throat.

"Yes?" He asked, looking hopeful.

"Ah_nothing."

He chuckled mentally. What's the matter Darling? Frog got caught in your throat.

Oh wipe that smirk off your face. So I'm no better with words than you are. But at least give me a little credit for making an effort.

So now what? The clock's ticking and the lawyers are due here any minute. And at that moment they both checked the time on their watches. Thump_thump_thump went fingers on the wooden table.

Did she gain weight? At least ten pounds he'd say. Yes she definitely did. And she was just glowing all over.

Is he blind or what? Can't he tell that I'm pregnant with his child_our child.

Could it be that she's pregnant- wouldn't it be wonderful. He thought dreamily. Imagine me a father singing a lullaby to our baby; bouncing little Laura on my knee. Or little Harry. Well boy or girl so long as he or she is healthy.

Should I even bother to tell him that I'm pregnant? Would he even care? I think so. But I don't want him to continue this marriage out of obligation. He's going to make one TERRIFIC Daddy.

She's going to make one TERRIFIC Mommy. I know she mightn't think so but she definitely will. Well I suppose if she is going to have my baby- our baby, I should speak now or forever hold my peace. Oh no, she's getting up from her chair. I knew I should have spoken up when I had the chance- nice going mate. PPlease don't go, not before I tell you what's really on my mind and that I_. No, she's not leaving, she's going over to the window. Relief washed over his face, not that she'd notice since she had her back turned to him, struggling to push the window up. "Stuck_damn it," he heard her say in frustration, when the window didn't budge. Just as stubborn as someone I know, she thought.

Well that someone leapt up his from seat and practically ran over to her side. "This seem to require teamwork Eh_so how about we both push on the count of three." She nodded in agreement. "One_two_three," and together they forced it up, opening it. Lots and lots of fresh air at last- much better they thought.

One problem solved. Now- how about the other?

"Never failed Eh_teamwork I mean," he said, showing those pearly whites.

"No never failed, " she said, looking into those warm and friendly blue eyes, smiling sadly. This was no time to waste words. "I really NEED you and WANT you in my life," she told him truthfully.

"And I NEED you and WANT you in my life," he told her truthfully.

"Then why are we here?" She wanted to know.

"Because I thought that's what you wanted- out of the marriage now that INS was no longer looking over our shoulders- scrutinizing our every move," he told her.

"And I thought that's what you wanted_" She said her voice trailing off.

"It's not," he told her honestly.

"It's not what I want either," she told him honestly. "I love you." she confessed softly.

"And I love you_I should have said it a long time ago then maybe we could have saved ourselves_"

"The important thing is that we've finally said it- those three little but very significant words, to each other. From now on let's look forward and concentrate on the future," she further said.

"You're right, and I do look forward to having a future with you."

They both checked the time on their watches. "They're due to arrive shortly," he realized.

"Let's leave before they show up," she suggested in a soft tone of voice.

"Good idea," he agreed, taking his wife's hand.

And together they walked out of the room, and they would be together_forever.

The End

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