Steele difficult 3/5
Date: Thursday, March 30, 2000
Francis Piper <lovemydds@hotmail.com>
Ok steele no takers on the beta
reading so I am going to post with the errors, sorry I have tried
to catch as many as I could, but with my 8th grade education I
am not as book smart as I would like to be. So I am sorry for
my lack of grammar, this is the first time I have ever tried to
use it.
LOL
Steele Difficult 3/5
"Why do I do that?" Laura said out loud to no one in particular "What did he say that was so wrong? Why do I insist on pushing him away? Hasn't he proved his love time and time again? Stupid, that's what you are Laura Stupid." As she finished her tirade she noted that she was standing by the front door of the Westchester home they had bought shortly after there return from Ireland. "He was so happy day we got the key. After Mildred finally left that day we thought it best that the house be properly christened we made love in every room of the house, saving the master bedroom for last." She walked in the door stopping at the entry way continuing her thoughts. "Not only on that fateful day had we made love in every room and every position imaginable but out of that loving day came the news that we would need to set up a nursery, because you were on your way little one." She put her hand on her abdomen. Continuing on she began to tell the story to her unborn child. "When I discovered you were growing inside me, I was more then a little overwhelmed, your Daddy was beside himself, he was happy but wasn't intending this family to be more then just the two of us for quite some time. He came around once Mommy assured him that it was all going to be fine, and that he would make a wonderful father. I just had to tell him "Mr. Steele, we are going to be wonderful parents after all we both know what NOT to do right?" As Laura was continuing she heard the front door open and saw the cold blue eyes looking straight into hers.
"What the bloody hell has gotten into you woman?" I simply state that we need to discus our options and you throw me out of the car. What the bloody hell goes on in that… that… mind of yours?"
This was a turning point and Laura knew it either she react like she always did and throw an insult in his face or she could throw herself in his arms and beg for forgiveness
"What do you mean what the bloody hell goes on in my mind? What the bloody hell are you thinking?" She was running on pure adrenaline by this time. "The way I see it we have no options until the baby is born and know for sure what we are looking at." looking into his face she realized the only option he was considering, "You bastard, you don't want to go through with it do you? Remington this is our baby, a baby created out of love, how could you want to end a life that we created?" with this said Laura turned her back to her husband and walked away.
"Laura wait" Remington reached out and grabbed Laura's arm. " Love you heard what Dr. McGregor said this child could need around the clock care for the rest of its life, hell Laura we can hardly take care of Nero, to tell you the truth I have had serious doubts about this whole pregnancy from the start. Its not that I don't think you would be a great mother or that I would be a good father its that I don't think our lives are exactly conducive to the raising of a child." He looked into Laura's eyes hoping she could see the love he had in his for her. "Laura bringing a healthy child into our lives was going to be difficult to say the least but bringing a child into our lives that needs special care for the rest of its life is neither fair to the child nor to us."
"You mean too you, just say it, bringing a child into this world is not fair to you, especially one you won't be able to bring into the "family" business" She turned back and pulled out of his grasp running up the stairs and into her bedroom.
"No dammit you are not running away and you are not pushing me out, not this time Laura" he yelled as he followed her up the stairs and into the room
"Look lets just give it some time give me an hour to myself and you take an hour to think about everything and we will meet up down stairs on the Sofa and come up with a solution we can both live with ok? I can't do this right now Remington." She looked up into his eyes "Please?"
An hour latter they both sat on the sofa, The uncomfortable silence was beginning to get to Laura, "Ok lets put down all our options on a piece of paper and discuss the possibility of all of them ok?"
"Ok"
As Laura rose to get a piece of paper Remington Grabbed for her, "one small favor before we make this decision?"
"What?"
"This" he pulled Laura on top of him and touched his lips to hers, running his tongue along her lips before allowing it to pass between them, hoping that this kiss would show her that nothing is going to change the way he feels about her.
As Laura broke the kiss she grinned down at him "This is what got you in the situation in the first place." Laura got off his lap and headed to the desk for some paper and a pen, they had begun this little habit of solving problems around the house shortly after they moved in and Remington wanted a big screen TV in the nursery.
"ok lets get started"
"Abortion"
"Continuing on with the pregnancy and raising the child"
"Adoption"
"Laura you don't…"
"Remington this is a list we need to write all the possibilities down"
"Ok what else is there?"
"Don't think there is anything else, either we have the baby and raise it, we have the baby and give it up or we don't have the baby, those are all the possibilities as far as I can see."
"Ok so where do you want to start?"
"Lets start on one I am sure we can agree on, Adoption."
"Well I am sure you know that I in no way want a child of mine growing up in the system, adoption didn't work for me and it certainly won't work for a child that is born with a handicap"
"While I don't entirely agree with you on all of what you said Remington I do agree that Adoption is out of the question, I have no intention of bringing this child into the world to hand it off to someone else to raise." She looked into his eyes and grabbed his hand " I couldn't stand the thought of a little you walking around out there and me not being able to hold him, when he was sad"
"Ok so we agree Adoption is out of the question"
"So now Abortion"
"Abortion… It's such a nasty word Laura but I believe it's the best for all concerned, With our lives how can we possibly give this child enough attention, the attention that it would need attention that it deserves?" He got up to pace knowing this was the biggest decision they've ever had to make. "Laura what is going to happen when we are 80 and still taking care of a child in a grown persons body, or when we are gone and this child doesn't have us any more?"
"While I was upstairs I was checking on the computer and I found a bulletin board about this subject they said that it's best to have another child right away because the second child will help the child with disabilities to grow and develop." I agree that it will be difficult but I had been wanting to tell you this since the day I found out I was pregnant. I don't want to work full time after the baby is born, I know the agency has always been my number one priority but after I found out I was pregnant…I don't know the agency just doesn't seem like as much of a priority as it once was… don't get me wrong I'm not like mother or Francis. I do want to work on a few cases, but I think I have earned the right to pick what cases I would like to do and what cases I would like to pass on. We are secure enough financially that we can afford what ever this child needs, we have put our lives on the line enough maybe its time we hire some operatives, of course we would have final say on all reports but Remington I love you and I love this child that we created I just can't imagine loosing it by choice" She took a deep breath and grabbed his hand, "God doesn't give us things unless he knows we can handle them."
"Let me see if I understand you" He looked into her eyes "you want to have this baby and then turn around and have another one right away correct?" Disbelief now apparent in his features "Not only this but you also want to stop taking cases, and hire an operative?"
"Yes I do" She looked at her hands "I know this seems sudden but its not, we are getting of track here. I know you are concerned about our life but you heard the doctor it could be a slight disability or it could be severe, we won't know until the baby is born and Remington I don't know if I could live with the fact that I terminated a life growing inside of me." She looked into his eyes "I just don't think I could"
He wanted to take her in his arms and assure her that he would never ask her to do anything she didn't want to do but this was a serious matter so instead he opted for "Ok so now we go onto topic number three: Having the baby"
"I think I just made my case for having the baby,What do you think?"
"Well its your body but its our life, I think we need to sleep on it for a while and then come back. I understand what you are saying but I don't think you understand what I am trying to say, who is going to take care of this child when we are gone Laura, we are not exactly young?"
"Remington we can set up a trust our child would be taken care of, we could make sure we have trusted people around, besides this is not the only child I plan on having with you." She leaned in close to his ear; "I want this house filled with the pitter patter of little feet." She met his lips with hers and sealed that statement with a long passionate kiss.
After he caught his breath Remington looked into her eyes "Laur…"
"Shh…" she put one finger to his face "Let me finish, Rem what ever we do we do as a team right? So if we do this as a team this child will have more love then any child could ever imagine having and we will love this child no matter what happens to him." She looked down at her hands "As long as we do it together we can do anything."