- Finished Steele (Part One of
One -- The Complete Story)
Date: Friday, November 16, 2007
- From: "screechmonkeys"
- Finished Steele
- by Xenos
- Disclaimer: Characters
from RS used without permission and strictly for fun.Lots and
lots of fun!
- Remington carried Laura up the stairs
with ease though the doorway to their bedroom at Ashford Castle.
The room was bathed in the soft glow of the moonlight. He closed
the door with his foot and released her from his grasp so that
she stood ever so close in front of him. His arms around her
back and hers around his neck, they gazed lovingly into each
others eyes. Time stood still for the would-be lovers, but there
was no need to rush. They had forever ahead of them.
- Their lips met in the most sensuous
of kisses. Everything was perfect until the shrill sound of the
telephone pierced the silence. Laura quickly went to the phone
and pulled the plug out. She smiled sheepishly and returned to
- "Now. . . Where were we?"
she whispered as she entwined her fingers in his hair and captured
his lips with hers.
- He enveloped her in his arms and
moved them toward the bed. Slowly, they undressed each other,
relishing the moment. First went his sweater and turtle neck
followed by her sweater. . . Next their shoes and socks. . .
- "CUT!!!" the director
bellowed. "What the - " There was commotion on the
set. "Oh, my God," he said, more than a little disgruntled.
"Pierce and Stephie. . . Thank you. Great job as usual.
Everyone, take five." He held up the script and shook it
fiercely. "Who the hell wrote this shit?"
- "Um. . . That would be me,"
she said meekly, trying to hide.
- "Xenos. I should have known,"
he said, smacking his forehead.
- He flipped through the pages. "What
were you thinking? 'They were finally in bed together. . . Naked
and in each other's arms at last. They wasted no time. Remington
rolled over on top of her, pinned her arms above her head and.
. . ' Oh, my God! Did you think Stephanie and Pierce would really
do this scene?"
- "Well, I know Pierce would.
Trust me. In a few years you'll see *a lot* of him. "Live
Wire". Pierce Brosnan. Lisa Eilbacher. New Line Productions.
1992. Scene 17. Unrated version. Widescreen edition. Makes the
paint peel off my walls. "The Thomas Crown Affair".
Pierce Brosnan. Rene Russo. MGM. 1999. Scene 25. Oh-ho-ho, yeh-heh-hes!"
- "What on earth are you talking
- She was lost in her reverie. . .
And proud that she actually got to quote her two favorite movies.
She sighed. All those wonderfully delicious nude scenes! Damn,
he was hot! Oh, how she wished she could have seen Laura and
Remington consummate their relationship like that. It had been
such torture watching them dance around each other all those
years. . . and she enjoyed every single solitary moment! Well,
except for the fifth season, which probably would have been great
had it not been for the addition of a certain ill-conceived 'Italian
Stallion' that left her wanting to put her foot through the television
screen. But here they were, like it or not, shooting the last
scene of "Remington Steele" when she tried to sneak
in a little something more to satisfy the fans.
- "Yep, Pierce would do it,"
she said with confidence. "Stephanie, I'm not so sure about.
But I will gladly be her body double if she doesn't want to,"
Xenos offered sacrificially. *Sacrificially*?! Yeah, right. Who
was she kidding?
- "Xenos, Xenos, XENOS!!!"
he cried, shaking his head. "When will this obsession with
- "Well, it'll still be going
strong 20 years from now. I guarantee it. . . And I doubt it
will ever change. Sorry."
- "Did you really think that
you could write this, this, this. . . *crap* after all the wonderful
episodes penned - without grammatical or spelling errors, I might
add - by such greats as Michael Gleason, Glenn Gordon Caron,
Jeff Melvoin. . . "
- ". . . Susan Baskin,"
she continued. ". . . Brian Alan Lane, Lee Zlotoff, Brad
Kern, John Sakmar. . . "
- ". . . Kerry Lenhart and John
Wirth?" he challenged.
- She chuckled. "Of course not!
I was just writing down some stories that have been floating
around in my mind for a while. But you can rest assured. . .
I'm done now. Any more of my silly little musings will remain
just that - *my* musings."
- "So you're done writing? You'll
never post again?"
- "Never say never. . . But for
the foreseeable future, yes."
- "Hmmmm. . . " he pondered.
"I don't really know what to say."
- "That's OK. I do," Xenos
said. "To everyone who enjoyed my flights of fancy and shared
their feedback with me. . . Thank you. To those of you I offended.
. . I'm truly sorry. For those who helped and encouraged me -
you know who you are. . . I am forever grateful."
- She reflected back on some wonderful
moments and then continued. "To Anne Rose. . . I hereby
relinquish my crown. Thanks for giving it to me in the first
place - though I'm still not sure I deserved it. And to Christine.
. . I'd give back my 'XXX', but I'm afraid my dirty little mind
precludes me from doing so. Even though I won't write it anymore,
I'll still be thinking it." She grinned evilly. "Finally,
to Zinger. . . I hope our little foray into 'Steele Blushing'
was just the beginning of your fanfic career. Go for it, girlfriend!"
- "Is there anything else?"
the director asked sarcastically.
- "Yes. I'd like to tip my hat
to Michael Gleason and Bob Butler for creating such a wonderful
show that will stand the test of time and keep us chatting for
countless years to come. And, of course, my undying thanks and
gratitude to Pierce and Stephanie for fleshing out these remarkable
characters and giving us 'lightening in a bottle'. We couldn't
have asked for more. . . Well, except for an 'I love you' and
a sex scene," she said, hoping that last comment didn't
come off sounding snarky.
- "Are you done yet?"
- "Yes," she sighed. "Yes,
- With that, Xenos finished one last
story and sent it to the RSFic Group.
- THE END
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